How did my little man become known as Milk Monster? That is a question some have asked me lately, and the story is cute. One night my little man was playing on the living room floor while I was sitting at the computer in the recliner. He crawled over to me and began to tap my feet, making noises to get my attention. So I leaned down to pick him up, and sat him in my lap. He turned himself around so that he could face me. For a moment he was simply staring at me, intensely. He laid his head on my chest and for a moment I thought he was being affectionate towards mommy. Oh how I was wrong. He put his arms on my shoulders and stood himself up in my lap, with his head on my chest. He began to then headbutt my chest, making an "mmmm" sound as he did so. He would then look up at me before sitting down with a grin on his face. This was followed by him smacking my chest repeatedly. He would wait for me to look at him, then he would begin to stand up and headbutt my chest again. So I finally asked "Do you want milk?" He stopped instantly, and laughed at me. That was my sign, well of course I want milk mommy. That was the night Milk Monster came to life.
    Moments like that make it easy to remember why I am breastfeeding. There are times of course that make it difficult to remember why I am doing it. I am talking about those late nights where all I want to do is curl up and go to sleep, but instead I am laying in bed nursing my son. There are nights where I feel like I get less than three hours of sleep due to him waking and wanting to nurse. His pediatrician and others have told me to get him to go back to sleep, or to let him cry it out. Yet something inside of me always felt this was wrong, letting him go without eating through the night. His tummy is so little compared to mine, and he has been continually fed on demand for nine months while growing inside of my womb. Maybe he does just want the comfort of being near mommy. How can that be so wrong? All of you moms questioning whether or not to co-sleep or to simply hold your little one in the night, pause for a moment and consider this. Your little one has been in your warm, safe womb for nine months. He or she has known your smell and your voice for nine months. Why do we suddenly expect them to sleep away from us and through the night so suddenly after coming into this strange world? Babies need reassurance that we are not leaving them, that we are nearby, in order to feel secure. The idea of keeping babies in separate spaces came about in a time when infants struggled to survive and children were treated as little adults. Babies were kept separate so that their parents would not make them ill, and children were expected to grow up very quickly. In most other countries, babies are kept close to their mothers especially at night. Babies do not cry to manipulate us because they do not know how to manipulate. They cry because that is how they communicate with us. Their cries tell us they need us, whether they need us because they are hungry, need a diaper change, or simply need us to comfort them. I did not always know this. I always felt better having not only my milk monster near me at night but also his 4 year old sister, The Princess. My mother co slept with my sister, so luckily she understood it to a point. However it took a lot of research and looking to other mothers on blogs to understand I was not alone. So although I may hear people telling me to not nurse him at night, or to keep him out of my bed, I know in my heart I am doing what is right for my child. We mothers have deep, natural instincts that come from generations upon generations of women making decisions for their children. Do not let someone make you feel bullied into changing how you raise your child. You are a mother and in your heart you know what is best. So even in those weary hours when you feel like you haven't slept in months, stay strong mamas. You are not alone.